The course of true love never did run smooth.

OKAY, im in school comp lab 1 now. WAHAHAHA! teacher is so dumb and she doesnt even bother bout us. she's the little indian girl which give me the impression as she's a student when she's walking into our class. she damn short okay! LOL. =x

andy and isaac kept singing.. wth.. so annoying la! and andy still thought that he's singing is damn nice and asked us whether his singing is okay anot. sulaiman bluffed him and he really had the wrong idea that he'd sang WELL. and thats ridiculars la! and that isacc is also singing as if he's a superstar NOW! * smack head *

and ongling kept asking me for D&T housing style.. lol. she've got 20 houses and i only have 8 restuarant. our group have not started on our work piece and the other group have already started the previous lesson. omg, we are lagging behind for our workpiece for N level.

okay, i seriously hate D&T like so much till i rather not study... so many research is needed to be done. holiday, i have to come back and rush our workpiece. ohhya.. just now, isacc wanted to change for PE just now. & me ongling and shiqi snatch away his clothings and we went into the boy's toilet just not to let isacc change.. we throw his shirt up to the speaker on the class. LOL. he's so poor thing.. as our toilet is all our classmates.. eveybody was laughing espically when ongling ran into the cubical to stop isacc...

omg, SEE. isacc and sulaiman is playing with andy's papa name. wai tong. and we always call him Andy Wong Wai Tong instead of Andy Wong Yi Fei.. LOL.
okay, im just bored now and try to blog to kill time. sorry to take up your time reading yea? LOL
and today is the last day for AM working in superdog. byebye.... .... ....

pardonme, cause i dontknow what's love about.

okay, today slacked at home till 4 and head to tiong and met up with baby. was actually meeting nowell but end up never. SORRY! and yah, her relationship with lihao is going to be 2 months old. JIAYOU my GIRLFRIEND! =D

wento mos buger and have lunch there! (: YUMMY. errrr... came home and wento play basketball behind my block... yaya! i nearly won dear in ABC okay! its like i won him already... then i shoot air ball and go back again... then play till we 2 are at the 3 pointer... which is the last shot.. he goal )): nvm at least i improve alot okay!

came home and he was playing with my psp. mom and uncle joe came... mom was like talking to dear and he's very afraid... but Sigh.. okay, i think some will know what am i thinking already.. and so is nowell yea?

he headed home... my mom won the first prize 4D. my IC no. WOOOHOOO. i think i can get a ipod or whatever soon! =D and uncle joe won his hp no. yesterday too! WAHAHAH.. and he gave me 50bucks(: going to cook for mom tomorrow(:

i cut my hand accidentally while looking at the book. baby got so worried and scolded me for being so careless. ): but see.. i've got a nice boyf. dont be jealous! =x but after all, he's more blur than me.. he dint style hair today! HAHA. and he said that he's very ps to go out like this. LOL.
omg, i feel like bathing now for no reason. SIAN. and yah.. after tomorrow, superdog is a place for me to go for the sake of working, not for the sake of fun in working. Sigh. ):

the bond that is fadding.

i have not got it over
i felt helpless when i saw _____.
so many thoughts and images of memories flashed back.
i thought that the sun will shine after the rain.
but the rain dint stop at all.
life for me isnt good.
but life for him wasnt bad.
tell me, why cant my life be like his.
why cant i get that over?
its been 1year 7months of L___.
yet, i cant let go yet.
you know, i still miss you when night falls.
when you will always call me at the same time of night.
there are still many things in me..
which i cant post out at all. Sigh):

you took away my smile.

okay, yesterday met dear for mac breakfast. ROAHAHA. then met up with ongling and head to dear's mum working place to buy moving rubber as ongling wants to style her hair... dear helped her...

head to to queenstown prison there to play pool. and after play for 2 hours, we head to queensway accarade. again, i spent 10bucks there.. dear doesnt allow me to play and i asked lihao and octopus to buy for me and he doesnt know bout it. aahhaha, ohhya, lihao and octopus came while we were eating laksa! yummy! i wanted the mickey mouse so much! its like we need 1500 tickets when i only have 500plus )): its damn cute la the minnie! ))))':

head to sergangoon(dk how to spell) and get my ez-link card and i help seng to return his uniform... he scolded the RM not the rusbbish manager ah.. its the resturant manager... and blah blah blah... head to concert at punggol... DAMN BORING pluuuhhhhleeeassseee! before going in, we head to toilet again cause of ongling's hair. and dear was like saying. " im ready but it may hurt abit " imagine in the toilet and you were standing outside.. what will you think? LOL. we are laughing like hell la.. while styling and its like their talking.. and ongling was tell dear to stlye higher but she was saying.. " shang yi dian x2 " lol. okay, skipp the stupid joking part.

there is this stupid guy whole danced till so. .... .... LOL. i also dont know how to describe. okay.. SKIIIIPPPPPPPPEEEEEEEDDDDDDDDDDDD. after everything ended, we head to superdog. and have our dinner there! lol. okay, i miss my fellow colluges there! ): and my AM is leaving)): i tried to asked him to stay, he refused. Sigh. and i nearly cried out when i was talking to him... walked to toilet after that and ongling chased after me as she saw that i cried. ): okay, i will NEVER cry infront of people. it makes me feel like wanting pitynes from people lah! im not like her. bleahs! =x dont feel like working anymore if AM were to leave. he's the one who accept me into superdog, who interviewed me, who allows me to disturb him when we are working. ): i swear, if i can open my own restuarant next time, i will find him back again... everyone in superdog is leaving.. so am i by MAY. leaving for sure. and will get another job after that. maybe not. dont wanto work anymore.. when is like when u just go in, everything was so fine and wonderful... but as time goes by, everyone is starting to get tired and leave. the friendship that was build during the months have been destroyed like this.. when seeing someone you care that leave. )): FUCKOFFLA. DAMN THE RM.

head home and dear sent me home.. and ongling came after that... they stayed at my house till 4am and left. dear wanted to walk home and its like WTH? crazy... yaya, fell asleep while messaging him. SORRRY! bhahahahha!

i found new, something told me to stay.

ohhkay... im really damn fed up with this fucking girl. pardon me for all those vulgarties... never seen a girl so BHB before, SERIOUSLY.

go round and comment on other people's thingy.
backstab her OWN friends.
betray her OWN friends.
only go to new friends and throw old friends aside.
never treat her OWN years of friends well.
lie to her OWN friends.

tell me, this kind of person should no longer have friends around her right? still have the cheek to do all these over and over again. do you know what's trust? DO YOU EVEN UNDERSTAND THE WORD? uhhh? do you think people like you? they dont. mind you. nahhbey cheebye! the one who will run away when troubles occur... and kpkb when the things end.... talk till so big but when you are facing them, you just kept quiet. and please remember, the thing is started because of you, yet you still have the cheek to let us take the rap for you? FUCKYOU. like i said, i'll never help you anymore. NEVER EVER. always back out in last min when we asked first. do u think we really want you. hahaha!

brainless fucker.

okay, i wento school today and was early too(: Ali came back and wanted homework from me... and lucky enough, i did some.. so no WAC for me... am waiting for ongling's call as we argreed to meet up, so does sam. but till now, still no news of hers -.-

i pin up my frindge the whole day and its like WTF? i even went for recess with my frindge pin up okay? SSEEEEE. im a guai kia okay.. im ONE! baby wento buy things with his papa and im rotting at home, BORED AND SLEEPY ): how i wish the show would start now and i can watch already ) :

tomorrow going to church for concert.. and before that, im going to play basketball again! ((: slept damn late yesterday like 3 plus am? and woke up at 6am today... WTH.. damn sleepy in class and teachers kept trying to find things for me to do. Sigh.

mood wasnt good at all today.. as i skipped school on thurs because of some reasons. and today, my mood wasnt bad in the morning till like after assembly... after i saw _____. and im not in a mood for anything till recess, i kept smiling for no reasons when i dont even feel like. Argh! and my mood now is STILL BAD. who can help me?!

its our love that i cant let go, teach me, will you?

okay, im sorry! I SKIPPED SCHOOL TODAY! which i've mentioned in dontknow how many previous post that i wont skip... i dont know why! I DONT WANT CHENG LESSON! ROAR. wento poly clinic and consult a doctor. cause i cant give letters anymore.. its like 1 year, i can only use 3 times .. but only 2 weeks.... i used more than 3 times... lol... & Tay dont allow me to do so already... ROAR.

ya so met up with ongling and octopus came, he woke up late so he skipped school also. ate and head to play basketball... lucky no fight today.. leannrd and the iskanda came... they played friendly with baby... and they got along well... HENG AH. and i kept cursing the iskanda to lose so that he'll do pumping... and true enough, he lost to baby! HAHA...

thomas and his bro came down, and as baby is playing with them finely, so i wento have a match with thomas and his bro with ongling... we won kay! HAHAHAH. then wento return ball to cheeho.. and baby and them got along well, and might have another match again if we met. but.. haiz, forget it.. nothing.. hahah. okay, no link.

head to holland and grab my dinner. baby wanted to send me home, but i dont want.
okay, i've got no mood to blog anymore.. byeeee!

tears that aint dropping.

okay, bus-ed to school today per normal. and lessons were fun? for today... almost all teachers aint here except for maths and sci ): pe teacher dint came too.. so mr pan came... we wento hall and have our PE.. CAPTIANS' BALL... i hit away sia's ball quite afew time.. cause he's tall okay! yaya... all the way till school ends, baby came.. & we waited for nowell... ... ...

wento redhill and get $$$ from my papa! finally, im not poor anymore? LOL. ate and baby, lihao & nowell came to my house and study... and something happened to me and him again. Sigh.. i dont know why did i even flare up because of small little things with him nowadays. Argh.. but he dint complain, instead, he still talked to me nicely despite my attitude towards him.. my mood is damn bad now.. mood swing again...

im afraid, if my attitude continue to be like this..he'll also leave sonner or later.. Sigh. i dont know what to do laaaa! should i ask him to change a new girlf? or .... Argh, i dontknow la... my mind is blank, you know? B-L-A-N-K . FCUK!

time will not heal, understand?

" .... " hahaha! helping my ex to scold me?okay, step by step yea?

why should i accept your dare when you dont even dare to put you name out?
no matter how i treated him in the past, does it concern you? its between me and him, if he's unhappy about he, i'll accept his scolding and wont fight back.
i dont think he'll bother to scold me EVERYDAY like how you come and tagg me as i believe, he'll have so much better things than you? he might never even read all this post or even come to this blog. (:
who are you to help him to scold me? i dont care.. i believe he wont sent you here to scold me, he isnt that childish. trust me, i've know him for a year plus... and had been together with him for nearly a year. i know him well. might not be veryy. but at least, i believe that it will be more than you. if he wanto scold me, he'll do it himself, i dont think he needs you to kpo too.
and another possibility is, you like him thats why you got heartaches when i treated him that way. but dont worry, i wont have the chance anymore. cause we're no longer together yea. or do you wanto help me to treat him well as a make up for him? but i think, he'll get himself a better girlf that wont be like me.. but dont think too much, i STRONGLY believe that, it will NEVER be you.
yah, he've left, so all my nonsense he doesnt have to care or be bothered by it..neither will he be sad because of me anymore.. and mind you, its been nearly a year since the break up. i do count... and so, he've been free for so long.. -.- why is he still being hurt? do you have a brain?
i admit that i regret, but please, i dont have to act and why should i act pity to gain his forgiveness? like i said, im happy with my life now, and the only thing i wish is just to be friends with him. why should i do all this shit? and, not because i still love him or whatsoever, its the friendship that i cared.
please dont put words into my mouth.. cause i dint say that i wanted him to miss me, did i? i admit, i do miss him at times.. but never did i wanted him to be same as me. get it? so tell me, which side of your brain isnt function-ing well? have i stated clearly everything there? uhhh?

im not wasting my time replying in my shoutmix because im matured. but not you.

whether do i feel guilty towards him or not,

whther did i treat him well in the past or not,

whether do i really love him or not,

its all between me and him. we have sort out everything during the breakup.

so tell me, its all been settled between us, and why are you comming in?

like i said, if you like him, tell me? i might not have the courage to talk to him...

but for the sake of you, i help you ask whether if he wants to give u his msn?

hahhaha, pathetic freak(: im not going to post anything for you from now on...

& i will be stopping my friend to play along with you as they are busy people..

ohh you? get a job if you're bored, thats what i did in the past too(:

bus-ed to school with nowell and lihao today.. ehh, everyday i should say. and got a bunch of noisy fellows laughing damn loudly for fuck? inconsiderate. school was slacking as some of the teachers had went for the sec3 camp.

played basketball after school. DAMN _______. a fight broke out.. both side happened to be my friend -.- it sucks when i mean, both side are my friend but they both dont know each other... so.. dont know what to say also.. sad bout it... am talking to kevin now.. damn guai lan. LOL. but he's cute.. (: see, i never bad-mouth you okay! LOL. 7years of friendship ..

bus-ed home after that. had a bathe... and my eyes got swollen for no reason.. hope it will recover by tomorrow so that i can attend school tomorrow.. if not, i will skip.. see, i've not been skipping school for 2 weeks already. GUAI okay! ROAR. hopefully, i wont skip school for no reasons from now... as i think, my motivation for motivating me to school is back.. i dont know why too.. then i rather, _____ isnt the one who is motivating me to school. Sigh):

i wanted to help, but sorry.

okay, .... im not scared to reply... cause im just being stupid to tagg along with you.. like i said, leave my friends alone. they dint offend you at all. so stop trying to get attention from them yea?
so what if im afraid to say hi or whatever so. non-of your business.. do you think by doing this will make me go and say hi or what? hahah. this stupid method wont work on me. get it?
are you trying to make me get bothered by all these things that have been said by you? nonono! hahhaha. .

omg. the channel 8 show at 8pm is damn nice.. omg, i nearly cried okay.. wahahhaha! that guy waited for the girl he love for 7 years... omggg... sweet la! yea.. so when happiness is in your hand, dont let it slip away.. hold it tight and treasure it yea? dont ever give your happiness away when you're holding it.. you'll regret... and when you're in love, its just like you're in a dream, you'll wake up from the dream in tears on you cheek. ROAR.
wanto watch 9pm show now.. HAHAHA. byeeee!

happiness is always hiding.

okay, the person in my tagboard is seriously damn free. still got no1 somemore? ahahhaha! no life. pathetic(: whether do i say " hi " or not, does not bothers you. tell me who you are and i'll show you that i dare&will.

head to school as per normal today.. i nearly woke up late uhhhs! school was boredom. and those sec3s mates had gone for camp. COOL. i wished, i were still in my sec3.. maybe at camping. that was the time, i loved my life most? think so yea.

actually, wanted to play basketball after school and i cancel it. for the sake of my ball have got no air. )= sadddd.. im tired.. me and dear have not really finish quarrelling. hope it ends soon, hope not. i dont know. FUCk. byeee!

you'll never guess so.

omg.. one idiot came tagging me with all those broken english?
nvm, i shall play along with you.

no1. you're comming after me, so dont insult my friend for godsake.
no2. my mom dont fuck guys. and dont drag my mom in. i make sure i will find you out.
no3. louis is my DAMN GOOD FRIEND, and please dont get jealous.
no4. eunice is a girl. if you're a guy, shame on you.
no5. whether i were to say " hi " to my ex or whatever so. does it matter to you?
you like him uhhh? go and woo him laaa! im not stopping as im nobody to do so.
no6. you're trying my tagboard and leaving a damn dirt shit behind.
no7. write down your name if you really dare. and i will show you that i will say a "hi" to him.
no8. i dont act lian or whatever so. this is my attitude. so what if my atttitude will kills me? even thou i have this AP, at least. i have friends around me.
no9. i dint claim or say that im pretty, yah. maybe ex pajiao.. but does it concern you?

you seriously have not been into love at all.. or did you just fall out of love?
its a part and parcel of our life, im walking out from it which i dont think you know or you did. if you " like " him, go and add him up in msn or whatever. instead of comming here. u think you are helping him to scold me? if you think you're. but sadly, you aint.. cause, if he wants, he can come and scold me in person or whatever. if he isnt.. why are you trying to be a kpo.? go and add him and tell him you like him if you are.. dont you dare? ohh! i dont think you dare lahh.... firstly. i've got a name that im proud of is " S H I R L E Y " which you only have a " . . . . " only. its pathetic, i understand. and i think you're getting bored as my board have already reached the limit of 60post per hour. please attend school regularly if you're schooling.. cause your english foundation, is needed to be improve seriously... if you're taking N or O. i think you'll get a F9 in this situation. if you're not schooling anymore, get a tuition teacher and teach you. i dont need you to comment my life and dont even need you to read my blog. and lastly, my friends aint for you to comment, and im happy for my life now.. and im loving my life even thou i may still miss my ex. that's life and i dont go round to comment on people's life too. nobody or life is perfect. so is mine and yours. are you jealous of mine? jealous that i still have friedns doting on me even thou i have AP and you dont have? poor thing yea? & like i said. if you're a guy, shame on you. check if you've got balls behind you cock. if no, great. means you are abnormal. if you're a girl, means you've got no friends with you everyday and you are jealous of me yea? hahhhahaha! pathetic freak. (: are you waiting for this post for a long time? here, dumbass. (:
* then i think, your attitude is worst than mine, congrats. you won me(:

不知不觉又过了几天我想我习惯了忽略
去忽略美丽的世界不情不愿走在谁身边

我想我适应了一切这一切没你的世界
某条路某条街某首歌某截点某种熟悉的路径却刺眼
不碰决不跨越为自己留一些安全界限

谁都以为不听不看也就没感觉
一转身才发觉空气里面依旧飘散着记忆的气味
是有所谓或无所谓也不能改变
原来是我在爱上你的那瞬间就困在围墙里面

某条路某条街某首歌某截点某种熟悉的路径却刺眼
不碰决不跨越为自己留一些安全界限
谁都以为不听不看也就没感觉
一转身才发觉空气里面依旧飘散着记忆的气味
是有所谓或无所谓也不能改变
原来是我在爱上你的那瞬间就困在围墙里面

look at the lyrics as the song plays. LISTEN to this song, damn meaningful. but still, i prefer my own blog's song more =x click play now! OKAY? AHHA

Sigh, i think, i still miss my past. of all songs, it just reminds me of _____.

okay, called ongling out to study as im so bored at home plus bw wento find his friends. he promised me to get donut at suntec city yet dint. >:( okay, ongling waited for me at bukitmerah centre and as usual, i was late. )): SORRY. and we totally have got no mood to study at all. she suggested that we should go to queenstown library to study and i refused. and guess what. if i were to go, i would meet bw there. LOL.

head to play basketball after that. wento tiong and waited for bw and fyn like damn fucking long. cabbed to cheeho's house there and play.. i hurt my leg okay. ): me and ongling VS fyn and bw. sent ongling to cabb as she's late .. waited for bus with fyn. and called nowell out for dinner too(: lihao rushed home when she heard that nowell's comming. LOL. and yah.. eat and came home.

having cold war with bw now. Sigh, i wont say sorry. cause Argh. all of you will think that im unreasonable again. But wtf is wrong with him, i dont know. nvm, whoever that knows what had happened to my last relationship will just fucking-ly push all the fucking blame onto me. but anyway, i dont need you people to comment on it. if you aint close to me at all, shut up. yaya, im unreasonable, whenever quarrels approached, im the one who is at fault, im the one who started it. thats it right? _!_ Argh, damn moody now. forget it, im not a girlf material. shut up for those who have already started to comment on this.

if i haven met you, what would i be?

okay, fucking moody now.. am talking to lynnette, i think. spelling error. sorry! about my stuffs. ex-queenswayans. she's very brave, i feel so. seriously. i like her like seriously. i mean, her courage and everything. and i've really got beaten by her courages luhs! * white flag *

wento work on time, ehh! no. i was 3 mins eariler. do all those opening stuffs and help aunty ann. seeee! im nice uhhh! =x burger was damn slack and it does not seems like its a SATURDAY. slack around superdog and kept disturbing dennis. blahh! ~~~ baby came and fetch me.. dint bring money out today ): and borrowed from dennis. as i refused to use baby's money. head to have chicken chop for dinner. and played basketball. andrey pia cab after movie just to get the ball for us. how nice right! he's damn nice. and quite blur. haahha! and he joined us. saw jiandong, guohao and weeleng. they came over and joined us. and baby and andrey played team with them. aaron came after that.

and andrey is damn nice like seriously. and i kept snatching his ball from him.. hahaha. poor boy. people always tend to bully him luhs. BAD PEOPLE! ( for those who bully him ) and yahh!

nahbey cheebye. say my friend not pretty. and what? you took her photo and showed your class and yet all say she ugly.? then i think, you have to do some SERIOUS SOUL-SEARCHING. if she's ugly. then are you pretty? you are so far so much uglier than her okay. FUCK YOU! dont say you reject how many fuckin guys luh. if they are wearing spec, ask them to change, if they are not. ask them to wear. BHB to the max. * claps * dont let me see you, cause i dont know what will i be doing. i will never give face and make u ps infront of people, i swear. cause i dont think i need to pity you anymore. i used to pity you and be friends with you. omg, no wonder you have got no friends, look at what you're doing? serves you right! i'll sure be seeing you again, dont worry. _!_ mother fucker.

heart racing feeling, when you get when you see him.

okay, i skipped my remedial today. as in studies with teacher outside. okay. and i skipped work. im sorry if i were to skip work. i dint mean it. Argh. fuck. nahhbey cheebye! okay, went out with khairul shiqi and raz today.. we took neoprints. saw brian, sumei, boonpeng and michelle. so many people la..

head to cresent to find baby. he's playing basketball. Andrey is damn kelian, everybody kept snatching his bball from him and he very blur lor.. hahah, kept laughing at him.. and once he get a ball, within a sec, his ball got snatch away already. LOL. after ahwile, he got hold of the ball, he wento aside and play. hahahha. i spot him and dear wento snatch from him. hahaha, poor boy.. and when they play match, he came and chat with me as im sitting alone. how nice(: thanks. saw guohao, jiandong and weeleng. hahahha! jiandong told me that they wanto have friendly with us, but we rejected. HAHHA.

jiandong, cause you bu shou huan ying mah! =x and next sat, we'll have a gathering BBQ for all 6/6 people. so zhangde 6/6 people, please inform me or jiandong if you saw this post. and i miss you all! OKAY! hahahhaha! tomorrow opening burger i think): SIAN. have to wake up early. but if i were to work form 12 to 5. i will be cashier and i dont want! ROAR!!

shall go and sleep now. otherwise, baby will nag at me like hell ):

i love you so.

omg, please. dont act lian please. _!_ have any comments about ITE? so what you aint in NT ? uhh? ohhh, SORRRRRRYYY AHHHHH, i never name any names or stream hor, so if you wanto assume that im refering to you, i dont mind. maybe you're already one? LMAO. nahhbey cheebye, only when you got into a SINGAPORE POLY or a JC then come and talk " BIG " hor. dont even know whether you can pass you N or O levels, wanto kpkb. what da 'fcuk? lol, and please, buck up your english when you've got a damn lousy vocab and grammar, thanku. cant even speak, type or write a proper english, please go home and study before doing. cause you are just making yourself like a FOOL, stupid. * roll eyes *

i admit i might not have a good english foundation, but something that im sure of is, my english will be better than yours. though mine is NT standard. but, i saw damn lots of error. i know i have myself too. but i dont insult others. enough of scolding, cause it boils my blood. Grrrr!

finally, class's sitting arrangement changed. a U shape. woooohooooo! and tomorrow, im having remedial and will be meeting khairul and helmi for further studies again. so, skipping work tomorrow. ): Sigh. damn long, i've not been working and the mood for working had gone. ): and now, class is playing with water everyday. and you have to be careful with anyone around you or any place you sit. must check before u can even sit on your own chair. OMG. lol..

sports day is fine, we cheered well and yet blue house got the champion. WTF? we started all the cheer and bomb then and they got it? wth. and please luhs, we're sitting at the damn corner. can you get someone over and listen to how we cheered for our house mates? NAHHBYE _!_

wento have dinner at telok "bangala" "dont know how to spell " cresent with lihao, nowell and boonwee. the whole road from stadium to bustop, im in a damn low mood. i wont elaborate much of the details.

but, Sigh): why is this feeling comming back again? i think, i need to really think of all the things that i need to. & have i really let go of everythink and start afresh. Argh! FUCK. i dont wanto have that feeling when i ___ _____ . you know? but, _ ____ ____ _ ___ ______ ___ __ __ ___. but, _ _____, ___ ____ ___ _____ __ _____. BLAHS =x

waited for dear to play finish his basketball and i sat there looking at him playing with his friends. and ya, on the way, i asked "Ondrey" dk how to spell. but called him in this way.) whether he needs me to carry his bag for him as he's standing and his bag is damn heavy. dear doesnt allow him to sit as there are 2 big size guy standing near me and he wants "Ondrey" to stand beside so that the guys cant get to stand beside me, as he have to move in as im sitting with another girl. hahah. poor "Ondrey". he rejected my offer and kept laughing at me o.- lol. alright, im tired. shall go and bathe now)): NIGHTS!

thousands of people, i still saw you & it wasent my imagination.

roar! got disturb by rismail early in the morning of the day. and of cause, khairul is always there to help me! LOL. okay, our class doesnt play any chair rolling or trolley pushing.. they started to play water. -.-" they took the dont know call what from science lab and kept splashing water at people. the hottest game in our class now. so beware when you pass my class.. you might just get wet & dont even know why. HAHA

azahar took newspaper and crush it into a ball and put as muscle. -.- LOL. and he took afew crushed ball and put into his shirt at stomach and pretended that he's mrLow. how cool? and whole class were laughing like hell and rismail got punish and have to stand outside classroom. but he doesnt look like being punished as he's still fooling around outside making us laugh..

okay, chalet had become BBQ only as its gonna be a waste of money if we were to book the chalet. and nobody's gonna be sleeping anyway. and spend the money on food better.. wakakakas. im so looking forward to it can! and it held on 10may cause of rismail bday. hahah
everybody is going to bash him up. POOR RISMAIL. sulaiman asked me to buy egg so we can throw rismail and i said that we should not waste money as we can use stones? LOL. dont look down on rismail okay, he's DAMN STRONG like seriously! he's a fighter. thats why. COOL uh!

im sure if everyone were to go, we'll sure play like CRAZY. FOR SURE OKAY. and i think i should not play too rough as my status doesnt allow me to do so. Sigh): but nvm, i'll be sure having fun at the BBQ. rismail might be bringing his girlf along too. only the girl or boyf from our class can go for that chalet. lol. and hopefully that rismail wont do any wrong things cause we're going to be drinking on that night. LOL.

our class is like damn crazy today okay. many things happen. skipped. wento study with ongling today after school. and i ate damn alot. FATS are comming out! ><>

tomorrow is sports day. and mrchua came to our table telling us to go. cause he knows that we've skipped our cross-country. omg! he remember it like damn clearly lah. so long ago already. -.- bo bian, wanted to get MC tomorrow. cause it will be damn boring. but nevertheless, im skipping my PE tomorrow. PE first period. and we are going to the stadium for running! OMG, no THANKU. noway im going to run there. yadayada. im skipping my dinner, cause i wanna go on diet. NIGHTS and BYE! =D

your love is with me.

mixed feelings.
mood swing.
devastated.
lost.
restless.
lethargic.
apathetic.
exhausted.
frustrated.
infuriated.
nostalgic.
pessimistic.

okay, thats all the feelings in me, and i really dont know what to do anymore.. im falling apart soon. nobody understands all these feeling. neither do i understand myself now. what have gotton over me too. exams are comming and it had really stressed me out. plus all these useless nonsense, i might as well jump off the building. Grrr! hope that all these unwanted emotions will get off soon. F U C K.

okay, fucking early in the morning having hair check -.-! and im the damn first one in class got caught for hair colour. but luckly mrAli isnt here as he've gone for reservice. and mrTay closed 2 eyes luhs. shall skip the next month hair check already. cause i dont wanna dye BLACK. NOWAY!

slept at english lesson. ): i dint mean to do so. but its damn damn boring okay.. trying to collect class fund for my BBQ thing. okay, that sucks when everybody kept delaying the collection of money. Grrrr. but nvm, still, everybody is participating. (: helmi lost his psp yesterday and he's damn sad today. poor helmi, hope that the culprit will be caught. DAMN that idiot.

wento queensway with nowell to find my mum. cause i wanna get addidas shoe and jacket. but end up, i dint get any for myself but a zinc bag. LOL. and the pattern of the shoe isnt the one that im looking for. and i nearly got a kappa jacket for myself but the XL size seems so small luhs. so dint get 1 for myself): but that jacket damn nice luhs! Grrrr.

nowell told me that i shouldnt get these branded stuffs cause its waste of money. but end up, she saw a shoe that is damn nice and she say that she wanna save up and get 1 for herself. wth. and she gave me excuse that cause she hardly buy all these shit. lol. and the laksa in queensway rocks man! damn nice and not spicy. nnnooononono! its abit spicy! REALLY. even for me who doesnt eat chilli AT ALL find it nice too! MUST EAT OKAY!

cabbed home with mum as nowell went home with lihao. met dear at tiong as he wants to eat. ohhya! i forbidden him to eat ice-cream due to his cough. lol and he's dying for ice-cream EVERYDAY! HAHHAHA! sorry. im a bad girl. and now, im damn tired but i have to complete my english homework that mrAli gave before he comes back and give me WAC. ohhno! i dont wanna go WAC.

ohhya. quarrel with cheng again today. sorry ah! its not my fault okay. partly yes, i admit. but the fucking reaction on his fucking face really puts me off. FUCK YOU! cofiscated my ez-link card, so is ongling's and shiqi's one. and he wanted us to collect it from him after school. okay. NOWAY. shiqi still say wanto go entertain him because of the link card. NOWAY. i dont even have the time to entertain him. he can have the ez-link card if he really needs it. cause mine is with my friend and that card dont belong to me too. nobody's one, grandma dont know took from where. since he's so poor that he've to walk to school everyday, ( always complaining that he've to walk to school every morning in CPA lessons ) let him have it then. POOR NOOB FUCKER. he sucks. DAMN SUCKS. nahhbey! _!_

its the matter of time.

okay, i just woke up from my lalaland.
school was fun, i mean my classmate made my day, not lessons.
can you believe that i've not slept for whole day.
okay, sorry yes, at D&T for only 1hour?
people came selling electronic devices.. and wah! COOL.
dear came while im installing the wires. & he stared at me.
lol, he's shocked to see what im doing for D&T.
octopus came and borrow ball from mr Tay, & dear wento play.
head to tiong after that. so many food! im drooling! =D
and tht stupid lihao asked me to watch out for my saliva.
cab-ed home despite wanting to save money. ):
and baby say tht i can only cab 2 times a week )): BAD BOY!
and he's complaining that my shirt is too big all these already)):
he dont used to complain all these last time! BADBAD!
he's hinting me to change into a smaller size U when im
still thinking of buying a bigger U as i find this too small )):
he's busy with his holiday homework now. POOR BOY.
alright i shall go to sleep now. cause im bored. lol. nights

one with no shame;
copy people's style till this way.
please, you're really beyond hope. this is for you. _!_

i cant figure out, why.

0kay, i w0ke up super duper late today.
baby called and chatted with me till im TOTALLY awake.
and yah, he came to my house downstairs and fetch me.
head to take money from my dad. $_$
and wento kfc for lunch! =D yummmy!
had a brain stomming where to go as its last day
before school starts again ))): CHINATOWN. lol
we went round like crazy and ate lots of road stalls food(:
and and and, i bought a pants and belts (:
i've decided to save money from now on.
so friends, if i wanna spend money, S-T-O-P ME!
okay, im really dying for more holidays..
after school starts, 6 weeks, it will be 1 month holiday(:
seee, before this holiday ends, i've already look forward to the next one.
blahblahblah, hope tht my mid-year will pass.
and then i can have my holiday happily.
and stupid hakim had already reminded me bout my BIRTHDAY ):
i dont wanna meet up with you guys ): LOL =x
just a birthday wish is MORE THAN ENOUGH. hahah
okay, shall continue the conference before kevin shouts at me! LOL

though i may miss u at times, but nvm.

who can tell me, who am i now?

who can kill me and let me die?

there aint any passion.

okay, have been lying on my bed for 2 hours yet cant sleep. Argh. & again, i think of many things once again. sometimes, things always change unexpectally. for godsake, im starting to hate her more. oversensitive and unreasonable.

but i was like her in the past, hopefully, i will be able to change. baby told me tht i should control my temper if not, my temper will kill me. yah, i know. but how to? it doesnt takes a day or a week. i think, it'll take years for me. & i doubt it will succeed it. Sigh. life's really bad for me.

i cant feel tht im happy now.
i cant feel that im in love.
i dont feel that im being love-d.
i dont think im a good girlf.
i dont think i will not be unreasonable.

Arggh, who is able to help me? i dont wanto turn to anyone for help this time round.
maybe if i could end my life just like this? i know its silly, foolish and stupid.
Sigh, i hate my life, i hate myself.
how i wish, all the dreams of mine will be able to come true.
how i wish if i could stay in dreams of mine and never wake up.
that would be best ever.!

Cause you said no & I said Yes.

okay, wento tiong and met up with well, baby, lihao, junren & octopus came.
chatted with louis on the phone and wento meet baby at mac as he went off for studies with his friends. we walked home all the way from mac. okay, its just at bukitmerah centre. LOL =x
my mood isnt good yet, my mood is still the same.
will there be a kind soul who will appear to cheer me up, please?

there isnt any blessing.

okay, dont feel like posting at all. so a short one will do.

fucking school reopening is soon. 2 days time.

fucking holiday mood isnt over at all yet.

fucking mood swing is here and i cant control my emotions.

fucking day at home rotting infront of comp.

life was going from bad to worst.

who can tell me, how can i go back to the past.

return to a 12years old kid life with no worries.

i miss the times i had when i was young..

all my best pals with my everyday without fail to bring

laughters and joys into my life.

my life became dull when i came to a secondary life.

no true friends, yes there may be. but only 1 or 2.

whereby some treats you so well and u think

they are u friends end up hurting you,

doing all the fucking things behind your back.

they think you'll never know, but sometimes,

the world is just so small till you can never predict.

coincidence always appear out of nowhere.

and mirical always hide themselves till they are tired.

and once all these appear, cruel truth will appear.

so right infront of you till you cant hide.

Sigh, im tired of all this, i need a break. ):

?, nothing anymore.

might be going to zoo later
might be going to watch movie later

no words can describe the feeling in me now.
Sigh.

FINALLY, ________ and now, i felt relieved. OMG, seriously much better. & i really feel that she's very noble. & im really afraid that i might really hurt her. thanks a million & sorry. other than this, i dont know what to say anymore.

okay, wento tiong and met up with baby(: walked around and have my lunch at mos burger((: met mum and had dinner with her, baby came along too. head to queensway for addidas jacket! but dint get 1 at all, instead, i spent 30+ on accarde. =x saw yongsheng, aaron & ( i 4got his name ) at queensway too.. im really addicted to the games. OMG`

came home and watched the 9pm show and head to hollan.V .. ohhya! in accarde, we used cupons and changed a little small ultra man statue for baby(: FUNFUNFUN! i wanna the winnie the pool bear, okay, im not in love with it. but its damn cute! with a diamond on its face(: just like my mickey mouse too!

baby told me tht he's going to do a puzzle for me. LOL, sounds familiar? i wanted to do for him on Val`tines day yet failed =x 2000 pieces! OMG! MICKEY MOUSE PUZZLE! im so looking forward to it okay! =D =D

i think i shall really treat him well from now on. SERIOUSLY, i have not been treating him well for the past 2 months. hope that it wont be too late now): Grrr, im gonna be growing FAT cause i kept eating non-stop. BooooooHoooooo! shall go and bathe before baby call. cause he says im always sticking to my comp. Bleahs! BYEBYEBYE!

i wont, i promise.

i dreamt of something last night. OMG. at that time, i really wished that i will stay in the dream and never wake up. but still, i have to come back to this reality. & im really out of breath for anything or even, everything. Sigh): nobody will know how this feeling is. its killing me every moment, every now & then. the past is just too wonderful.

everything i do, just dont seems to be in my way that i want. & how i wish i could lock myself up in my room, off my computer, switch off my phone and everything so i can shut everyone away from me. i seriously wanto. & at times, i really wished that i will never fall in love at all. but if i were to go back to the past and choose 1 more time. i will take the same route but different attitude. but its all too late. no point dwelling. yah, i know. but nobody will understand the feeling at all. its easier to be said. but im the one facing it.

i cant do anything, at all.

i caused baby to be late for meeting his friends today. SORRY LOR! LOL. yah, winnie asked me over to her house and we cooked. plus nowell together! HAHA. DamnFun! & i really loved what nowell had cooked. SERIOUSLY, THUMBS UP!

baby finished up the chicken chop that i've cooked. && winnie gave him a big scolding. LOL. he came and fetched me after his study.. THANKS(: - touched la! - and today is another rainy day which i seriously HATEITALOT! cause i hope that there wont be any rain tomorrow if not, i can dream of going to zoo in sleep already ): PLUHHHLEASSE~ hope that it will be a sunny day tomorrow! )): HOPEFULLY!. but i doubt it will be.

okay, i've yet touch my homework or whatever so. ): SHITTT~ hopefully, i will stay at home on saturday and get all done! and time, please slow down ALOT, not abit. I DONT WANNA SCHOOL REOPEN YET! GODDAMNYOU! rahahahhahahahha! LOL. im going crazy. & guess what, i have a sudden urge to play basketball now! yes, N-O-W!
thats all for today! BYE-BUH~

stop, cause its going.

okay, i've decided not to go for that chalet. met alan, kevin, kimmie(again) alvin, hakim, nabil, ken & weeming. its nice to spend my day with them again. head to vivo. & ming sent me to tiong to meet baby for dinner. so i skip the chalet. SORRY! met up with thomas & baby. head to mos burger after that. after i ordered everything, baby then told me that he's not eating as he've forgotten to bring his money out when he went for fico. HOW DUMB! =x

so i forced him to go home and take money and accompany him for dinner as he's damn hungry. slack at void deck under his block. && head home at 11.30. i refused him to send me home as its like so damn stupid when he's at his house downstairs and send me home and come home again. and guess what. i dropped my ez-link card on bus. FUCKED~ when i wanted to go downstairs i touched my pocket for cards and dint feel any, and i knew that my card is at the seat where i've seated. and a fucker like me ignore and just walk down when i knew that my card is on the bus. Grrrrr. kinda regret now cause i've just bought my bus stamp yesterday)): wasted 30bucks like this. FUCKED!

i've collected my mickey stamp. SO CUTE CAN! with my name on it! ((: and i can stamp it on my worksheets instead of writting my name down. COOL right! different from others! LOL. okay, i guess i shall go and bathe and sleep now before baby calls and starts to nagg at me for staring at the comp. yaaalaaaa. nights people, animals, ghost and GODS~

im right here but without your noticed.

okay, i just cant get myself to study at all. i dont know why. Grrrr!
many things have been running thru my mind.
&& i seriously hate that feeling. ROAR~
i dont know why i cant study maths.
i dont know why i cant even do my english work.
the mood is just not right at all. and i dont know whats wrong at all.
thats the fucking problem. my mood swing is back again.. Grrr. hateit!
waiting for dear to end his fico, and gonna be meeting him for dinner.
might be going to kenn's chalet later on(: , might not.
cause i feel like staying at home, but i will meet up with u guys kay.
okay, time is flying way too fast. please slow down more! =x
gonna be working on fri and sat. hopefully i can work in kitchen.
cause time really kills ME when im outside, it passes damn slow!
okay, that kuku kimmie had just reached home, cause i just met her.
seee, i made the effort to do so okay. STILL SAY I BAD.
bad hair day today. argh, i just feel like slamming my lappy or
whatever things on my table off. FUCK!
my mood is getting worse than ever. HELP ME!
i just feel like shutting myself off from everyone else now.
nobody will be able to find me at all. even my best friend. Grrrr!
okay, shall go and take somethings from hakim now. ( drugs ) just kidding.
byebyebyebye..

i've been destroyed by you.

im sick of everything in my life. why cant i get rid of the past and look forward to my fufure.?

the distant became futher as time flies.

baby & I.

he always got bullied by ongling =x

ongling & ME~

dear & me, LOVES.

ongling and me. NICE VIEW OKAY

the boat is arriving! =D

she's troubled by me! =D

LOL.

i fed him tibits! =D

i love this dog! took by baby(:

snapshot by baby again(:

im tapping him.. SEE, he's big dog(:

okay, today is sucha a NICE DAMN WHETHER to go to pulau ubin OKAY! its been raining non-stop when i head to MRT for P.U. DAMNIT. & i have to pin up my frindge for god sake. Grrrr! & so many big dogs there okay! i wave to 1 dog.. and it came to me.. okay, its liker really so big that im so scared can! ongling " oi " at them .. lol. they are really pathetic there.. people kept chasing them away.. its like. WTF? cant u treat them nicer? and on the other hand, the treat the cats so fucking much nicer! nahhbey! okay, i should have bought some dog snacks over there the next time i go, which i dont know when too. but i promised the dog. =x SORRY, i know its abit crazy. so i bought some tibits there and fed them, happy to say, the ate them all up. HOW HUNGRY THEY ARE, imagine it yourself. its like nobody is feeding them at all luhs. cant someone there just spare them a mouthful of food? Grrrr. okay, we head to tiong and bus-ed to telok bangla for chicken chop for dinner! =D yummy! played basketball after that. lihao took ball down.. 1 werido guy came in. HE DAMN FUCKING GAY. =x i dint realise till ongling told me and kept making fun of all the actions. she made me laughed non-stop. HAHA. played ABC. again, baby won. ): SADDED. lol. " dont comment, i know there isnt a word called SADDED ".

head to lihao's house to return his basketball as he left first because of dota. and lihao lost in ABC. HAHA. okay, its fun over all. i just miss the dog in pulau ubin.

baby promised to bring me to ZOO on this comming thurs. hopfully, the whether will be kind to me on thurs. if not, i think i'll have to stay at home or shall go and find a place to S-T-U-D-Y.

rewind my past, dont delete.

okay, i just cant sleep at all now. i dont know why! somemore tomorrow im gonna be meet ongling early for breakfast. )): SAVE ME. i hope i'll be able to wake up early on time. okay, i wento mac with baby just now.. suddenly, i have the urge to eat mac. i dontknow why. wanted to order mac delivery.. but baby asked me not to be lazy ):
so ya, we head to BM mac. we laughed like hell in mac.. and he told me that he showed his parents the present that i gave him on our 2nd month anniversary(: LOL. im really laughing like siao. and we walked home from mac. its like he's fooling around the slope, pretending to fall. -.- CRAZY FREAK. hahha. my eyelid had been jumping non-stop. I DONT KNOW WHY TOO.
hope tht nothing bad will happen to me. or everybody around me then.

): SAD CASE, i've only got 80bucks to spend tomorrow. ))): SADDDDDDDDDDDEDDD. hahaha. my psp is charging now.. it used to be charged once a week. cause i dont bother about it. but now, i need to charge everyday. or even twice a day. see the difference? once initial D have been downloaded, baby and i have been playing non-stop. =x alright, im tired already. shall go to bed.
NIGHTS TO EVERYBODY! LOVESS`

at least, once better than non.

okay, im so freaking tired now.. working as hotdog today.. but i changed with eunice.. so i became doing burger.. (: i love wrapping burger BEST! damn tired.. people working outside is so damn fucking free yet never do anything.. and yet me and eunice who's working in kitchen have to come outside and help =.- wth is this luhs. only when RM is here. everybody starts to work. WTH. me and eunice was like so damn angry lahs.. aunty Ann also saw.. she also got abit angry and asked me and eunice not to help them when they aint busy but chatting their time away.. and throw 1 server outside serving and cleaning when its a damn sunday. WTH. RM should come earlier and witness all this.. ROAR!

RM came in and helped me as i wento toilet.. and i came back and saw him stucked with 5 burgers. hahaha! nvm, we tack-team together.. actually, he's not a bad guy either.. thats what i feel.. he still asked whether if i have eaten and offered me food to eat. seee, he's not as scary as how some of them think. im not helping. its the fact.

okay, im going to pulau ubin tomorrow with baby and ongling. baby promised to bring me there so longggg ago.. and now, finally! HAHAHHA. im so looking forward t it.. SERIOUSLY! baby's starting to ignore me for my psp. cause of the initial D that i've just downloaded it )): he's snatching it away from me! ROAR ROARRR ~~~ okay, shall go and do my homework already.! BYEBYEBYE~

okay. head to commonwealth to download some games into my psp. AAHAHHA. dear came down as im meeting with ongling.. okay.. wanted to eat.. butbutbut.. never.

head to tiong and meet up with him.. and we walked to kim seng CC to find fyn. we played ABC.

and you know what! among the 3 of us.. its not BOONWEE who wins. ITS ME! HAHAHA

I WON LOW BOONWEE ! IN BASKETBALL "ABC " i used to lose to him like hell.. as he've finished playing 4 rounds, im still stucked at the 1st one. if you did read my blog, you'll have some images of what i post.. unbelieveable uhh? the 3 pointer.. HAHAHAA! i told him i would be enlarging the word that i won him.. HAHA. okay, head to buy cake and wento don's birthday.. bought mango and happens to be what dear likes. HAHA

head to cheeho house and return him his basketball that dear borrowed from him.. and we walked all the from safra to cheeho's house. we walked to bukit purmei to get drinks. and we walked home. SEE. we've been walking alot today.. and sat at my house downstairs.. chat chat chat.. and he told me bout his past. so did i. fair isnt it. (:

tomorrow's working ): SIANZ. saddd ): okay. hopefull time will pass like wind tomorrow! IM SO TIRED NOW ): BYBYEBYEEE~ gonna help baby to blog, cause i saw spiderweb in his blog already. HAHA, nights people!

nono, it wont happen.

okay, FINALLY, its my holiday! IM LOVING IT. okokay. wento school as per normal.. was damn moody as somethings _____ ____. argh.. lessons was boring as ever. no doubt. class is always fun when recess end. cause khairul, rismail, sulaiman ... ... will always play with teacher's chair.. they use that as " skate board " and today, they upgraded it. the stand for OHP, they move it to dont know where.. and pull out the top part of the stand.. and start to slide around the class. LOL cool eh! and class chalet. im so looking forward to it okay! WAHAHAA.

baby got scolded from his dad because of his report card. ): & today, i waited for baby for damn long >:( .. but its because he saw his father.. thats why he got delayed. NVM then (:

forced him to go and find juepeng, cheeho, kaisheng... blahS~

head to singtel and get phone. sadly i dint get one for myself. and my psp is starting to have problems): SADDD~ & im starting to get bored with the game =x

so ya, dear. im trying to break the promise =x okay, hope that this week will pass slower.. AHHAHAAH! mid year's comming ): ): )): ! i think i should get to my books instead of my computer! HAHAHHA.. byebyebye!

~~i dont know why i dont feel the anger in me anymore,~~

~~i dont know why did i care when i saw ____ __.~~

~~it hurts me terribly when i know that you ____ ____.~~

okay, my mood is down down down.

my mood is changing like wind now..

which i dont know why.. maybe, im just tired of my life.

okay, met up with ongling and then head to vivo. my pay is like only 285$. saddd luhs. bought a new psp game that cost me 62bucks. i beg him to give him buy. cause he say i should not waste money. AHAHAHA. but end up, i still win luhs! HAHA. went to play pool at safra with him and ling. no people at there one. AHHA. is like we own the whole place(:

head to eat chicken chop with him. and i think i've neglected him because of my new game. he said that i must play at least 6months for this game before i buy. i agreed steady. but i know i wont. =x just for the sake of buying. ): okay, waste money, i know.

our 2nd month anniversary is like ending soon. & should i look forward to 3rd anniversary like what he said? HAHA, who knows whether will we have tomorrow for each other. ): OPPS. but hope so luhs. okay? HAHAHA
going to call him now, as my phone is with him. ): i miss my phoney! ROAR! okay. NIGHTS.

just cant make u smile.

okay, CLASS WAS DAMN FUN TODAY.

i love today so much... and my class is planing for chalet.

hopefully it will be a succesful one.

cause i dint managed to go last time. even outings ):

somemore this is last year, so i will go for sure.

NOBODY or anything can stop me this time.

i slept for like 3 hours in class.. i kept dozing off. ARGH

badbadbad habit. but i'll try not to..

but its really wasted not to sleep in this whether okay!

class was making me laugh my ass off..

they are nice but sadly, we are leaving soon ):

okay. head home straight after school. cause im going to collect pay.

ahhaha! means, i will be rich again!

& gonna be meeting dear later.

finally it's been 2 months since we're tgt. (:

and thank you for tolerating my nonsense for 2 months too.

hahaha, not 2 months but 5 months.

cause he've been tolerating my attitude before we're even together.

THANKTHANKSTHANKYOU.

progess report is out ): i failed all but not chinese. PRO UHH.

distinction for FAILING. ):
but nvm, i will work hard from now on. TRUST ME!

okay, gotto go now!! BYEEE!

once upon a time.

okay, mrtay is warning me about MCs to school. GOSH, he isnt like this in the past okay. he dont even bother about MCs or whatever. ): tmr CPA course work last day. DIEEE! i havent get the link right yet. nvm, dont fail can liao. class was fun. and khairul is my hero again today. i was chatting with ongling and when i turned back to my table, i saw a spider. o0 khairul helped me to catch tht spider away. SEEE! he rock! and i saw jeffery which had already quitted school last year. my classmate. sadd cause that he've left. cause he's nice(: my class is really lack of girls. 5 girls, 20 guys. AHAHA. 7 chinese and rest malays. AHAHAH! i got kicked by the soccer ball on my head. jasser kicked too hard and it hit me. ongling got angry and kick the ball at him after the ball rebounce from my head. ongling's my GOOD FRIEND KAY. my SIS (: and felt giddy all the way till now. its like im already so afraid of tht bloody soccer ball. & i tried to play today cause its a test. && now, im even more afraid that last time. i will sure run even futher away from the ball next time, only soccer ball. if only our class is playing basketball or captain's ball. HOW NICE):

dear came to find me after school. he kept wanting to snatch my bag and take for me. and i refused. i can still manage it myself okay. waited for nowell like damnn long? and head to tiong and get ready the present for dear. yah, i gave him already.. he kept smiling when he flip thru the photos. hope he'll like it. he kept laughing non-stop at the photos. cause i steal it from his phone and some of his friends had already gone to ITE instead of sec5. sad case for him.

yahs, am slacking now cause my head hurts. hope that thurs will come soon, and im looking forward to friday.. BECAUSE it will be the one week holiday that i've longed for! HAHAHAHA. and it means that mid-year is nearer. i have to work extra hard for that. ARGHHH~

you aint the one who start first.

i've place a bet with Lina that my post will hit 500 by june holidays.. & if i cant, i'll treat her KFC. HAHA. ROAR! sianz. im BORED.
okay, this is what i feels luhs... when im with;

Louis, Kimpeng, Boonpeng, Yongsheng, Aaron, Sihan, Siming, Stella, Yinlue, Abram i dont feel stress at all with them around me. seriously. maybe partly becoz we're from same stream. but i dont know Siming.

Binwei, Boonwee, Kweexing, Thomas, Junren, Juepeng, Cheeho, Lihao, Shuyu, Peishan, Munyee, Terrence, Kimmie, Lina, Huijie, Dennis, Willis, Jolyn, they make me feel nice and they dont look down on NT people. these are those whom doesnt carry any knife behind their back.

OFCAUSE, not forgetting NOWELL. she's the BEST friend of mine, EVER. =D

they made me know what's the world comming to. they teached me how to see thru people motive inside them. ROARRR~ i think, im thinking alot. HAHA. am going to school tomorrow. cause my friend have already gave me thousands of call asking me to go to school tomorrow. plus, there's sports hits' tmr. ARGHH. people do change. and they change fast. they are sucha nice person when i know them, but after sometimes. they changed. not only this, even my own friends, they can me treating me SO NICELY, yet spouting things behind me. HAHA. nvm, i will get to her REAL soon. dont worry. (:

i'll never bring the past to me present.

waooo~ my post hit 200 already and this is my 201th post. i came to post again due to boredom! hhahah. i heard something from his friends and im so confused now. FUCK. i wanted to blog, but i dont know what to blog. SIANZ. im still considering about our rs. im sorry, i have to. it isnt easy to manage all this now. like i said, i've got no time for all these rubbish now. im going crazy doing my english work. ROAR. soooo im gonna stop studying now. and hop onto my beddy and swim into my WONDERLAND. okay, off i go.
NIGHTSSLA~

kill that hatred.

okay, i met ongling just now and im not late. my taxi is just right behind her BUS. hahahahah! walked around tiong and wento print out all the photos. (((: gonna be done by tomorrow. have to print another 20 photos tomorrow. ): cause i just sent it from him phone. HAHA. so after pasting that 20 photos. EVERYTHING will be done. but i dont have juepeng's photo at all. i mean even if i have, he've covered up his face ): he've just gone home.. WAKAKAKA! im now studying hard already okay.. i have been studying every single day of my life now. for another 5 months to my Nlvl, i think. cause mrloo had already calculated for us.. and wanted us to work hard for our maths.. my powerful D&T project have not been done yet. ): as i have to pass up by this comming friday. goshh, and during june holidays, i have to return back to school to start doing the model of my ' resturant ' . hopefully, i will not fail my D&T for my Nlvl. BECAUSE, i've already calculated ...

failing my maths for N'lvl for SURE
passing my English, hopefully.
passing my mother tongue. that's OKAY still.
failing my SCIENCE for very high chance.
will fail D&T paperwork. hopfully pass my artwork.
might not fail CPA. but i cant predict that. as im doing acess this time round.

thats about all. hahahha! i need to pass ENGLISH for sure to go ITE. thats what the internet have stated. and two other subjects.mother tongue will pass cause i've never failed before but doesnt mean that i wont fail. i know my limit okay. and pass CPA if i work hard. so so seeE! im afraid that i will not make it for my course of culltdinary.( dont know how to spell ) as i've already make it as my " DREAM " day dream! HAHAHAHAHAHA. okay.. fine. im really putting in effort in my studies already after playing for the whole of my secondary life. i've already wasted 3years of my life. half year for some reasons and totally not even a single word is into my mind. and only, i managed to settle myself down this year. and have been fooling around for the pass 2months.. hahaha! and i then realise that i cant be playing anymore.. if not my future will be as bright as the sun that rises everyday in the morning! HAHHAHAHAH! okay, i've got my mood back to NORMAL. hopfully nothing will come in and bother me again.. cause i cant afford to waste anymore time on all these stupid stuffs already. ROARRRR~

i've always never forget to forget you ;

okay, i skipped school today as i mentioned yesterday.
okay, i think the time of me and nowell is spending everyday is getting lesser and lesser.. cause she got her own boyf so do i. SADD CASE LUHS! but nevermind, i believed that our bond is strong enough even though we dont meet each other that often like the past. and at least when i need her, she's always there((: thanks nowell! LOVES LOVES LOVESSSS~

2months anniversary's reaching soon.. hopefully things between me and him will be settled. somehow memories from the past kept flashing back.. and im gonna be breaking down soon.. real soon. i just kept listening to that 2 songs which really made me remind of the past. the guilt still stays in me.. after so long..

okay, the computer in my next room is dead, i mean, i dint use it after _____ __ with him. and i used it before i blog.. i saw all the past things again.. yet i dint delete it all away. i saw the post of his in the past. which i saved it down on that comp. & that comp is always been used by him. i deleted that away. so at least, i wont keep that post which i know something will surely happen to me and baby.

i told baby bout it.. and he kept telling me that its alright. he'll overcome this with me.. let me ask you, how long do you wanto go through this with me? you'll still leave one day if you cannot take it. isnt it? dont tell me you dont.. cause when the time strikes, you or rather all guys will just leave with a sorry. no doubt for this.

i nearly cried out when i saw his face expression yesterday, when i kept forcing him to go home. and i totally kept myself quiet as i cant force myself to ask him to go home. it hurts me to see him like this. but it hurts me more when i saw her in this state ... ... argh, maybe i should stop thinking so much now.. gonna do something later on. i mean, get ready the things for him on our anniversary.. hopfully he'll like it. cause im with him these few days with his friends.. And i took all their photos down. HAHA!

I would trade give away all the words that I saved in my heart,

That I left unspoken.

okay, this skin is done by michelle..
plain and simple.. THANKSS~
finally, the idea of my blogskin is out. HAHA~
IM LOVING IT OKAY!

school as usual, sucks. LOL
class was fun.. and i really loved my class.
my quarrel with boonwee havent end yet, i think.
im still thinking about it.. till after this week.
shall not elaborate much.. CPA sucks.
cause i still cant get the relationship for the links right.
ARGH, FUCKEEDDDD~
i've got ACCESS on my this desktop. so i shall start to
really explore the access so i can score A1 for CPA, hopefully.
im intending to skip school tomorrow..
head to tiong after school with ongling while nowell wento
buy phone with lihao, the guy who smashed his phone on floor.lol.
baby messaged me and i agreed to meet up with him after
thinking for a DAMN LONG time.
he's sick, yet he came all the way to meet me when he just reached hme.
okay, saw sihan and all his friends.. SIANZ.
baby walked home with me and lihao call and meet up with us.
ended up, i sent him home cause he's sick.
OKAY, but at least i sort out somethings with him during
at the bus when i send him home.
he told me a ghost story for like a real one..
at his house a long ulu ulu road. wahh..
a shiver went down my spine when i walked pass there with him.
SCARY OKAY. and imagine he have to walk home everyday
after he sent me home. OMG, i'll try to ask him go home early
and not let him send me home everyday in late night.
okay, he's calling me soon.. shall go and watch tv now..
byebyebyebye.

its hard when i saw your eyes.

its hard to accept the fact that im going to talk to her tomorrow.. im afraid of the outcome.. but if i dont talk t her, i will never have a peace of mind.. maybe she've regretted of what she've done... maybe she hopes to amend him... he still have guilt in him towards her.. why not both of them get back together.. isnt it the way that it should be? im the cause of the whole thing.. i should not even meet him in the first place at all.. its just a wrong start. which i shouldnt be appearing between the both of them. i belong to the world of darkness. like how im before i met him. i shouldnt have walk out from there. i should stay... and all the things i've done, i hurt her. i wanted to protect her, but i cant if i were to be still here. instead of protecting her, i hurt her deeper.. and who am i to hurt her? im tired of everything.. i always have to ask him, always have to.. im tired of always the one who's waiting for his call... and i dont even know whether will he if i dint ask.. i just felt like .. ..... .... argh. sick and tired of it. im lost on this track. totally, i cant hold his hand.. cause i cant, who am i to hold it? even if i want, each steps i took forward, he step backwards. we cant meet at all.. im tired of always being there to take the first step to do everything and follow by him. i dont used to do all this. and i dont know how anymore... ... .... .....
boy, im really tired of everything, seriously. i dont know how to continue. you'll need her more. just go back to her then, cause she once mean alot to you, so are you to her. it breaks my heart to see us in this state. but im sorry, i care more for her feelings than mine. you dont have a choice, cause the card doesnt lies in your hands.

okay, michelle's gonna give me the code tmr.
she helped me to do the skin!
WOOHOO! i just want a simple one like this.
i dont know why too..
the more simple, the nicer, isnt it?
baby's doing his blog now.. AHHAHAH
he dint bring money out today.. how blur! HAHA
i realised that i've just blog 2 hours ago.? LOL
okay. im gonna stop blogging.. before i get addicted to it =x
blogging do addict people okay!
ilovebaby! =D
ohhya, he's sick. hope he'll recover soon.
& his hair to grow longer back sooon tooooo!

okay, before i leave, i wanto say something.i dont know how often will you view my blog.i will make sure you're gonna have the feeling that im drifting away from you.. i wanto draw a clean line between us. trust me, i will. why should i care about our years of friendship when you dont? i dint do anything behind you.. continue all these nonsense behind me, trust me, i will give you 3 times worst than this. and make sure that all the friends around you will be away from you. i wont ask them to get away from you of cause, cause im not like you. but they will drift away from you by themselves. believe it anot, take it or leave it, FUCKER.

you know, im always here.(:

okay, im home-d.
head to tiong and pass my present to louis.
gave that kimpeng a surprise! (: SUCCESSFUL one.
siming was there too..
walked around tiong with them while waiting for baby.
saw kaisheng and andrey.
wento kopitiam and sit there chatting..
flipped thru news paper.. saw the terrorist that ran out from
dont-know where ahh. okay.. damnn fun with them..
cause i dont know why i just feel really happy with them.
baby came and siming and kimpeng say he like ahbeng.
i mean the way he walked. AHHA
so he went over to sit with kaisheng..
after they went off.. cause kimpeng's going for wushu competition.
JIAYOU OKAY! SEEE! im a GOOD MEIMEI!
went to sit with baby and kaisheng..
junren came after that..
blahs~ head to take money from my father..
and take chicken rice home(:
i love my dad chicken rice though i dislike him ALOT!
finally, things between me and baby's fine already.
okay, im just not a girlfriend material.
hope he wont regret being with me =x
okay, he's studying his maths now and im slacking my time away
hahahaha! i better go and study before he nag at me to study!
BYEBYEBYEBYEBYEBYEBYEBYEBYEBYEBYEBYEBYE.

on the whole, i know its you.

okay, i just had a small tiff with baby.
its my fault again, sorry..
but all the actions from you makes me think alot.
head to east coast with octopus today...
seng called and chatted with me...
till now, only he knows who's the bitch im talking bout.
& i will tell nobody else.. so dont ask. no point(:
zhenming dint come.. sigh..
picnic at eastcoast. with newspaper as groundsheet.
took lots of pics for huijie(:
played dontknow what ball.. and my stomach is killing me.
head to dontknow where for dinner..
we walked damn far. plus my cramps.. omg.
played huijie's psp. " crazy taxi "
damn fun okay! and my whole body moved in the direction as
how my car does.. LOL. and i walked into the grass. LOL
ate 2 chicken wings and 2 cup of milo..
dint drink any cold or gasy drinks today..
and damn hell, people giving out coke. -..-
nahhbeyy. giving out my fav's when i can consume it.
stupid baby doesnt wanto blog. ROAR.
okay, still not really talking to him now..
somehow, i dont wish that we'll be alright because of some reasons.
but on the other hand, i wished we will. sigh.
i dont know whether i should meet up with him tommorow or not.
im still considering.. and im starting to get stress.
i've got piles of homework to be finish.. ARGGHHH!
MrAli gave us 1 whole book of english pink book to do..
cause he's going to reservice next 3weeks..
so he said we'd be able to go thru when he's back.
cant he even let us have some peace when he's gone?
i hope that he'll be retain and have to serve for another 3 weeks.
of cause not too long, cause i dont wanto fail my english...
hahhaa! mrtay's not back yet.. hope he dont..
i mean, not so soon? maybe another 2 weeks more?
cause i still haven done anything for my D&T as instructed. =x
okay, im a bad fucking student alright?

ohya, i've the mindset of going to pub to work.
but baby doesnt allow. ): NVM.
i'll go if i doesnt have boyf then. SET.
MOODLESS. BYYEEE!

sorry.

OMG, my menses are killing me..
i dint sleep well yesterday night..
cause my cramps are killing me...
and i seriously cant take it, the pain.
woke up a couple of times during the midnight.
its the pain that woke me up okay.
pop down 3 pills after i washed up.
and i just ate 3 pills again. ROAR.
maybe i might be dying soon.. cause i ate too much panadols.
going to celebrate shiqi's and zhenming's bday soon.
currently waiting for huijie's call. SO LONGG~
im feeling damn sick now..
hope that i'll be able to escape the blah thingy later on):
im damn hungry now as i've not eaten anything at all.
i think i will only be able to eat when im at east coast.
baby's also busy with something now..
hahah. our timing had crushed yesterday...
we cant meet up.. but we did at the end..
he still come and find me despite he had to go home already.
thanks((: loves~
okay, my cramps are killing me again..
i wanto hop onto my bed now till huijie call. BYE

you aint. TRUST ME.